They miss us, too. But they're also having a terrific time with their grandparents in North Carolina. They are spending most of their time camping with their Papaw in his 5th wheel camper at a campground, not far from the beach, while their Nana works during the week. They go fishing, bike-riding, exploring, swimming, playing with campground friends, and a little bit of video games on their computers.
John has been getting together with them in the evenings to play 'Pirates of the Carribbean' online. It's kind of neat that they can play a video game together 2,000 miles away from one another.
When I hear their voices on the phone it makes me cry. Jeremiah is good at holding it together, but Jackson and I have shared a good cry. He tells me that he is having a good time and tells me of all the fun stuff they're doing. But he tells me that the food's not the same, the routine is different, and he misses his family.
Jenna misses her brothers, too. She asks if they are ever coming home again. Ten days must feel like a lifetime to a 5 yr old girl. It does to me and I'm 41. And we still have another 12 days left.
I took all the linens off my sons' beds a week ago to be washed. I haven't walked back in their room since then. It's too quiet in there.
If this is a taste of what the future is going to be like when our sons become men and start their adult lives on their own, I know it's going to be a very tough time for me. I didn't think them moving out would be such a big deal. John and I have often joked about the novelty of having an 'empty nest' and all the time we'll have together to do what we want, the peace, the quiet.
I like to think of myself of one tough broad. I don't get rattled or emotional about much. I rarely cry. Except I think it would probably be better if I did. My heart is aching and I feel sad and in a slump. I should just cry and get the inevitable over with.
It sure is quiet around here. I miss Twinville.
Jackson mowing our neighbor's grass
Jeremiah being his joyful self
10 comments :
It's like this, but not. There's time for a gradual separation over the years. There are years of prep work leading up to their departure. It's a little gentler than "yanking" your babies away at a younger age. We had an only child for nine years, then two in the house for nine years, and an only in the house again for nine years. We have three years before she's off to college. It's a lot to think about. I miss Kristin, our almost 24 year old daughter, but it has been interesting and usually fun to watch her become the woman she is. It does get easier, I promise. (note I said easier, not easy)
Oh my, this made me tear up. We have two boys and the oldest has been to camp this summer once already. He will be gone for two more weeks over the summer. It's a lot harder than I thought it would be. Chin up! They'll be home before you know it.
I guess it's a bit of a catch 22 - nice to have a bit of a break, but too quiet without them.
It's a great opportunity to spend time with grandparents though - sounds like the boys are having fun in NC.
I'm sure the 12 days will fly...
BTW, it is neat reading about all of your chickens - my FIL has 4 laying hens - he calls them his girls. Too cute. He also hatched 2 mallard ducklings - they imprinted on him. We get more emails with duck/chicken pictures than we do about grandkids and such! lol
This post made me cry. I spent the day yesterday feeling sorry for myself because I can't see my son very much. And I probably won't live by him for years to come. The holidays are the worst because I see everyone enjoying their kids. I never thought when I was raising my boy that he wouldn't live close by. I don't think it ever crossed my mind. So I know exactly how you feel right now. I am just thankful that I have a son that I enjoy being around instead of glad that I have an empty nest. It was the hardest thing I have ever done leaving him in front of that dorm room in Southern California. I should have told him No he couldn't go to school that far away. But I didn't. I gave him wings and now he is flying.
You have a few years left. Enjoy those boys and when they want to go to college far from home you tell them "NO"
Now you've made me miss them too! Your feelings remind me of the time when my daughter was only one week old and we had to travel 400 miles by car so that her grandparents could see her. (Not a good idea when you are in postpartum.) Anyway, we had been driving for hours when I told my husband to pull over to the side of the road. I lifted my baby out of her carseat and just held her and rocked her for a while. I couldn't stand to not have her in my arms for that long.
I'm still fretting about her leaving for college in Arizona next month.
I agree with the previous comment (well said). One key for us that I would share for you is for you and your hubby to prepare for that empty nest - hobbies, interests, volunteering, whatever means the most to you. Our two sons are 37 and 39 and married to wonderful girls. It's been a joy to us to see them spread their wings and fly on their own. We also love our new life - more time to travel, more money, more time just for each other, volunteering at our church, riding our horses. There is definitely a life after kids if you're open to it.
Thanks for sharing.
Dan
That is so sweet. You made me get teary. I can tell you miss them. That is a LONG time for them to be gone from their mommy.
I am sure they are learning a lot and having many great adventures on their visit. I imagine they will appreciate having this time with andd being close to their grandparents someday.
It is really cute that little sister misses her brothers! They'd better treat her really nice when they get back! ;)
Hang in there!
My oldest is 16. I can relate to your post. :( This summer he was gone for a week to camp. I will be leaving for a camp this week on the 12th and not return until late on the 19th. James leaves that same day (early in the morning) for a camp in Iowa and won't return until the 28th! I won't see him for 16 days!
Of course, he's cool with it. "Jeez mom, It's only 16 days, it's not like I'm leaving for college of anything>" Aaauuggghh, college is only 2 years away!
Luckily, as someone pointed out, we are able to do it in baby steps.
SeasonsEatings, Thanks for your sage wisdom. So very true. Sounds like you've been through it all and have spent much time thinking about it all...and have come to terms with it. I bet seeing Kristin blossom and become her own person has been both elating, frustrating, sad, and so very joyful.
Hi Mim, Thanks. It's a relief to know I'm not alone and it's all normal. Funny how we think we can't wait to get a break from our kids, and then when their gone, we can't remember why we wanted that break after all. haha!
Hi Luara,
Thanks for stopping by. That's exactly the way it is. It's nice to have that break, but I wish it wasn't so long.
They are having a great time, but when I hear their voices it makes me miss them.
Funny about your FIL. It's like instead of having a dog as pets, he's got his 'girls'. I think it's just great, of course! hehe
Hi Goatgirl,
Now there ya go. You've made me cry again, too! :)
I hear ya, though. I don't think I'll be encouraging my sons to attend school out of state either...or at least not across the country somewhere. There's not a whole lot of college choices here in NM, but I'm ok with Texas, Arizona or Colorado. haha!
I bet your son is so grateful that you are so supportive and encouraging towards him, and after he's finished school and doing that 'young man' stuff, don't be surprised if he doesn't move back closer to you and home. You are truly blessed to have such a special relationship with your son.
Hugs to you. :)
Hi NM, What a contrast you've shared with me. From your one week old baby girl....jump forward to that same baby girl on her way to college in only a month! Yipes. You are there, girlfriend. Is she your only one? And is she attending and out of state college? Will you then be an empty nester when she leaves?
Oh boy. I can just imagine reading your blog next month.
I know I'm going to miss her, too!
Dan & Betty,
I so appreciate your wisdom and advice and your different perspective. Your lives seem so rich, colorful, joyful and full. It's as if you are starting new lives, being reborn, if you will.
Wow. Something to think about and to look forward to.
Thanks!
Hi Pony Girl,
Yes! A very long time! I wish the grandparents lived closer so that my boys wouldn't have to go fo so long. A week or two is plenty, even for my parents. They get tired, too.
They are actually considering relocating pretty soon to Arizona from North Carolina. This would be good since we'd only be an 8 hour drive away.
And, yes! They'd better not antagonize their sister when they return. Of course, I wonder if Jenna secretly enjoys it, too! haha! :)
Hey CeeCee,
16 days! That is a long time, too. I think he'll miss you, though. He may not right away. And he may not even express it, but he will thinking about you and how he misses home.
Will he be attending college out-of-state? 2 years is such a short time! Ack!
My sons Jeremiah seems pretty stoic and confidant and doesn't seem like he misses me at all. While his brother Jackson will start to cry on the phone about how much he misses me and being home.
Somehow I feel that Jeremiah is the one who will be the most grateful to finally be home again when he gets here. Boys are tough to figure out, aren't they? But we sure do love 'em. :)
I find it very hard to cry too! I wish I could, I'm sure I'd feel better. I can't imagine having Logan gone for that long! I'm dreading him growing up and moving out.
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