Nothing positive to share

I've not felt like writing on this Blog for a while because I was afraid to somehow Jinx our potential situation...but apparently it made no difference anyway.

We were hoping that by the end of our Settlement Mediation on Nov 3, that we'd finally have closure with a fair and generous settlement, but that was not to be.

John took off work and then we flew, with our 3 children, from ABQ to PHX to CLT, and finally to Spartanburg, SC. We got a shuttle to the hotel and the next day a rent-a-car was brought to us. We then spent the day visiting friends and attending a Dr appt for John. The highlights were spending some special moments with my old homeschoolin' pals, Jessie and Margie and their kids. I haven't laughed that hard in soooo very long. Gosh I miss those gals!
And another highlight was a brief visit to our old house and Jackson & Jeremiah's old friend, Justin, who lived across the street from us, and whom they were very close to.

The next day was a living hell.

After leaving our kids with our attorney's sitter (who was amazing and precious...more on her later), we went to the Settlement Mediation appt. Our 3 attorneys were there to represent us and John's attorney had an impressive PowerPoint presentation prepared to show the Defendants.

The Defendant's side included their 2 attorneys, a rep from the insurance company, and a rep from Liberty U. . And then there was the kindly Mediator.

Immediately the main attorney from their side became defensive and quite rude while the mediator was explaining to all of us how a mediation is supposed to work, especially when the mediator explained that we should be serious in our reasons for being here and that if it is for the right reasons, "To come to a settlement agreement' that both side will leave unhappy. Because to settle in a case means that each side must give a little and often...alot.

Apparently, the defendant's attorney was not willing to follow those rules. And he didn't like being called on it either.

This guy acted like the typical Lawyer Shark types. We discovered that the majority of his cases involve him protecting large construction companies from having to take responsibility for their injured or dead employees, even if they did not ensure their employees safety. His job was to make sure that the employees got basically nothing, while the construction companies got away and kept on getting away. Nice guy, huh?

When he came into the room, he insisted on sitting directly across from John and I, instead of across from our attorneys, where he was supposed to sit. He was either trying to intimidate us, or he was trying to make sure his clients weren't affected by all the trouble and anguish our family has been through because of their lack of taking responsibility and lack of abilty to care.

After our attorneys did the PowerPoint presentation, I was asked to say a few words about what we've been through...but I broke up into tears. It was just so overwhelming. When they other side came in after a break, I tried to convey what happened to my family after the accident and how it has affected us, but aftrwards I felt that what I said was weak and did not explain the things that they really needed to know about. I was pretty mad at myself. I just had so much to say and no idea where to start.
I really wish I could have spoken AFTER the Defense attorney spoke their 2 cents worth!

Their attorney tried to claim that Jeremiah's injuries were not all that bad and could just be related to common ADHD. And went on to say that his brain injury wasn't any worse than a soccer injury!!!!!!!! (I later asked them how a child's brain crashing through a windshield at over 50 mph and then flying 30 feet across asphalt and landing on a road with rocks is anything at all like a little soccer injury??!!. I didn't think to also add that many children have sport's related head injuries that end affecting them for life and even turn some into 'vegetables')

The attorney also claimed that because we hadn't sought any medical care for Jeremiah since arriving in NM, that he must be fine. (Of course, I reminded them that my husband only makes $9.00 and hour and that money doesn't go far enough in feeding and housing a family of 5. That there is just no extra money for co-pays and prescriptions. It's also difficult to get into see a Dr because noone accepts new patients because of the huge influx of newcomers into our area)

The attorney also claimed that John's future earnings woulnd't really be affected because USairways was going to lay him off anyway and had already been cutting his hourly wage before her took the early retirement offer. (Of course, USAirways has now merged with America West as they had planned, they brought back any furlouged employees and are even giving raises to their employees. And it is in the works to create a possible buy-out of Delta Airlines! If John was still employed with USAirways we would not be living hand-to-mouth as we are now!!!) (But JOhn was forced to leave USAIRWAYS and we forced to sell our home because John had missed so much time off from work due to his injuries to his arm and head, the Dr appts, and the 2 surgeries that we just could not afford the cost of living in our home in SC)

The attorney also claimed that John would ahve it easier in NM because he wouldn't have to work so hard doing yardwork. (HAHAHAHA! It's obvious that this attorney has neve stepped foot in New Mexico! Grass doesn't grow by itself here and tumbleweeds grow out of control. Doing yard work requires alot of back work pulling and burning weeds, to have grass requires tilling, digging, and massive soil amendments. And then there is continuous upkeep with mowing and more weeding...and the extreme costs! And if you go with xeriscape, it's back-breaking work hauling in gravel and rocks, and planting drought resistant plants and trees!)

And this attorney claimed that John's health must be fine because he stopped taking the Przac he was prescribed to help him focus. (The prozac caused John to feel drowsy and he wasn't able to take it and drive to work, nor work around heavy equipment. It was either give up his job, or take Prozac. What do think most people would do that have to take care of 3 children and a wife?)

And let's not forget that this attorney claimed that John's previous therapist said that John had found ways to work through his disabilities and with constant attention to this techniques he would do well. He also went onto say that John had asked this therapist to write up a note for a potential employer that said those same things. Apparently this led the attorney to claim that because of these things, John must be 100% just fine!! (HAHAAHHA again! John made sure to show the Defendants what "techniques' he is forced to use on a daily basis, "A lined Notebook Pad" that he carries everywhere he goes and cannot function without, because of his serious long-term memory difficulties.
And as for the note to the potential employer? John wanted to find a good paying job that woulnd't toss his job application after the first mention of brain injury. Of course, that plan even backfired. When he got hired, after attending only 2 weeks of training he realized that he wasn't able to recall important information needed to perform the job and his only recourse was to admit defeat and resign)

And this attorney also claimed that during my deposition I said that I thought John could still do Airline work...that I thought it was like riding a bicycle, you never forget.
Which is true to an extent. John was trying to work a job where he had to lift heavy crates with a forklift, but I felt it was dangerous for him because he not only had to learn how to drive heavy equipment he'd never drive before, but he also had to remember what to do and where to place the heavy crates, as well as doing all of this on a strict time schedule.
He'd worked an airline job for over 16 years, and yes, like a bicycle,it would be difficult to forget how to do those same jobs and drive the same equipment. Remember that John's main brain injury involves short term memory...not long term.

But in relation to riding a bicycle with a brain injury. Think of it like getting back on roller skates after not riding for 20 years. Your body is nto in the same shape, your coordination is not as good, and you will probably get hurt.

And that is what I meant when I said that I thought John could the airline job better than the heavy machinery lifting job. But mostly I just felt safer with the airline job.....it was the lesser of the 2 evils safetywise.

Oh and then that attorney tried to make light of what I said in regards to our airline lifestyle by quoting me that it was a 'fun lifestyle'.
Not sure what his motive was except to make me look like I didn't take this case seriously, but I wanted to tell those Defendants that "Yes! It was a fun lifestyle...and oftentimes I miss it and wish that we could have that same lifestyle back. But most of the 'fun lifestyle' I was referring to was back before we had kids and had just got married. And that was because we traveled and flew together alot."

But would it matter what I said? Probably not.

Anyway, the rest of the day was of the same vein. A total flop...especially on the side of the Defendant's Attorneys. They showed their true colors and unwillingness to compromise and actually work toward a fair settlement.
We came down and down and down large amounts and money.
And their side moved up by $5,000 at a time. It was really quite pathetic.
And then they tried to play these hidie/peekie games where we'd give the mediator a private amount that we'd accept and they give the mediator the most they'd accept...and noone would know if anyone was close unless they were basically on the money...and then if we were we'd have to cross in the middle and give a little bit more.
It was crazy and kind of childish.
Of course, there was no settlement, and the defendant's attorney wasted everyone's time. Of course, they didn't care, they were getting paid by the hour ($250.00 an hour!) and their offices were right their in town.

And we had to pack up our kids and fly all the way back to NM again, waste another day and John lost 4 days of pay from not working!

Funny thing, though that happened, after the defendants side left the building, the attorney came back in and said he wanted to work something out with our attorney and would 'be calling him'. He also said that Liberty wanted too offer a 'free scholarship' to Liberty for Jeremiah.
(HAHAHAHA! Are they nuts? First of all, why in the world would we send our precious son to that school who has no morals and responsibility for those they have hurt? Second, why would we promise our son to that school when he has seen the total disregard of his family's health, safety and care? As well, how different would it be if we promised our son to marry a girl in the future, whether he wanted to or not? And third, Does Liberty think they are being generous offering what is basically a no-loss comp ticket and doesn't really cost them a thing?
The airline does the same thing for their employees, offering free airfare...on standby, if there is a seat available then we fly. It costs the airline nothing, but is seen by many to be a valuable benefit of working for an airline.
Pah! Liberty must think we are stupid and naive.

If they really wanted to be generous and show they care, they'd offer THREE scholarships, one for each of our children, who have all been affected by that accident in March 2005. And not to only attend Liberty. No! But for ANY college of their choosing!

Ok. So now we wait and see what their next move will be. Our attorneys are already making theirs. Hopefully, God willing, some justice will be served and we can finally receive a fair compensation for all that we have endured so that we can repair our lives and get back to living again.