Upon waking, crutching myself to the glass doors and onto the balcony, I see that the sky matches my mood.
I’m overcome with frustration and disappointment as the Eastern sky begins to warm with the first morning light. The sky looks as unhappy as I feel.
I feel like I’m playing some crazy game and I’ve picked the ‘Go Straight Back To Jail~But don’t Collect $200’ card.
I’m overcome by the way that the weather and the sky can not only influence our moods, but also how it can mirror our feelings.
I’m overcome with how small and insignificant we all are. Life goes on. The sun comes up, the sun goes down. Every day, no matter what we do, life moves forward. We can stand still. We can hold our breath. But we can’t make time stop, slow down, or move backwards. I really, really could use one of those ‘Do-Over’ Buttons right now.
(Update: I’m back to using both crutches again. I cannot place any weight on my left leg without pain. My left knee looks like a swollen muffin. Using the stairs is impossible without butt-scooting. I’m waiting to hear back from my doctor on when I can be seen. Hopefully soon. I’m praying for miracles.)
To see beautiful skies from around the world, go check out Sky Watch Friday.
From the Tower of,
54 comments :
But Lisa your pictures are gorgeous, remember that every cloud, no matter how dark has a silver or in this case a gold lining!!! :-)
hugs........
Jane and Gilly
Those are gorgeous sky pics! Wow, never see anything like that here in Ohio. I will say a prayer for you, hope you can get to be feeling better very soon!
happy thoughts thursday from me...enjoying your stormy skies there in the land of enchantment. know you are thought of and sending you boatloads of hugs and good wishes.
til later.
I'm so sorry about your injury. I can't imagine how heartbreaking it is for the injury, but also to not be able to ride your horse and care for her. :( I have a friend that grew up riding horses and won a lot of competitions, only to grow up and have several back surgeries with huge hardware and fusions. Now she can't do anything she grew up loving, but somehow she still keeps a positive attitude most of the time despite her pain and her favorite saying is, "Life is beautiful." I hope you can find peace in spite of it all and I'll keep you in my prayers!
Lisa, you WILL recover!!! Girl give it time, please, dont get all depressed, let me tell you some of my story.
In '02 I was on the way home from the grocery store after picking my 17 year old son up at school, we live up a windy river rd. A drunk driver passed cars on a curve and hit us head on, I woke up in a tangled mass of metal, it took the crews 72 min to cut me out, the average time in 20 min. I spent 11 days in the hospital had a rod put in my left thigh and plates and screws in my knee, and a plate on my left lower leg, also a plate on my arm. A bruised spleen and a concusion. broken fingers etc. etc. I spent 3 months in a wheel chair and special walker. I managed to get through all that.
6 years later I started having headaches and nausea, and spots in my vision. I finally gave in and went to the doctor. He sent me to the emergency room. My husband and I sat there while a doctor told us I had a brain tumor, it was the scariest day of my life!! I had surgery last March, and radiation therepy for 30 days last Aug. I spent 2 months in the hospital because I couldnt stand up without fainting, it was another couple of months before I could get up and not wonder if I would faint or not. I rode my horse that fall though and I am still riding!
I am telling you this because I want you to know how lucky you are! You will always have some pain, that is something you will learn to deal with.
I want to jolt you out of this depression your getting yourself into!! Girl you will do good, it hasnt been that long, the knee injury was the worst pain I have ever been through!! I know
So hang in there and pull out of this funk and positive thinking!! helps you feel a lot better!
I hope all this long post doesnt make you mad, the one thing I try to remember is, it can ALWAYS be worse. You could have had a head injury and left your husband and kids with a vegetable!! So keep in mind your blessings and forge on girl. (I say as I wipe tears from my eyes)
Pam
I like how the sky reflected your mood. Sometimes, that's the gift, right there. Although I know times are really hard, there is something in all of that is happening to you that tells me you must be doing something right! Although we don't always get to go on the path we wanted, the end result is different, and often we can't even fathom what it is until we've reached the other side of the mountain.
Thinking of you and sending you the warmest hug (straight out of hot season!),
Esther
I can sympathize. I'm facing two knee replacements. Beautiful photos.
Chin up! It's a long way to recovery, but you'll get there. I know it! And I think the sky photos are just beautiful and that's how you should feel........because you are.
Oh, that fiery sky is gorgeous. I hope you feel better soon!
Hey Lisa,
I am sorry to hear about you being back on crutches again.
The pictures are so beautiful.
Keep your chin up. Things will get better soon, I just know it!
Good thoughts coming to you from Georgia.
Pam
Great pictures and the mood of your writing does carry over the mood of the sky. I remember not being able to ride my horses for three springs in a row because as soon as it started warming up, I'd walk around the house in bare feet and break my toe on something. My coworkers got used to me wearing one slipper to the office all the time. Too bad we can't just rewind. I know it sucks.
Actually, the skies are gorgeous not angry. Sorry you don't feel well. I hpe you are better soon!
I'm always left it awe when I see such beautiful creations. Wonderful pictures.
This must be awful for you not being able to ride. Those skies really are so powerful and full of rage and turmoil, just like you at not being able to ride.
I feel so badly for you. Your photos are incredible, but i cant even appreciate them because of how you feel. I wish that i could send you some of our sunshine. Please be careful and know that a lot of people are praying for you.
Beautiful photos.
Hope you get better soon.
Mary Elizabeth @ Now and Then
Those skies are beautiful!!! I find it's better when I don't focus on what I cannot do or have....it's what I CAN do/what I do have that matters....not easy I know. Hang in there! I'm praying!
Oh, girl, I wish I could make it all better for you... hopefully the dr can see you soon and FIX it! :)
Your skies are absolutely breathtakingly beautiful... if they are mirroring your mood, then you must feel pretty darn happy ~wink~
Sending my hugs and prayers...
~Susan
What a violent sky. Beautiful though.
I hope that you heal soon.
Great photos! Beautiful!
Lisa,
Those are amazing, beautiful, stunning photos!! It makes me think of the sailors poem..."red skies in the morning, sailor take warning, Red skies at night, sailors delight."
It is okay to feel down, but don't let it last for to long. You need to pull out of the funk and be thankful for the simple things in your life. I know you are in pain, but it will pass and you will heal. Sending many, many, many (((((((HUGS)))))) to you.
Deserthen
Sorry your're feeling bad Lisa. Seems like a lot of fellow bloggers are in some kind of pain or sorrow of some kind. Keeping you in my prayers. Things happen for a reason, hard to think of it that way. As usual, your photo's are beautiful!
That sky is absolutely beautiful! A little scary looking but beautiful! I don't think I have seen anything like it.
I am so sorry you are still feeling down, we are all here for you and thinking of you.
I think once you can get into the DR and see what exactly is going on will help, I hope it's not bad, I hope your knee is just irritated and sore and you will start feeling better very soon!
Some times the frustration we feel is the precursor to our doing something to absolutely change our perceptions. Don't give up, just take the day as it comes, tear it open with your teeth and move foreward! Just like jumping into a pool, we have to go all the way to the bottom, before we can touch up and PUSH off towards the sun! Now do it!
Every day is a glorious do over! No matter what happened the day before, if you get to wake up - you get another chance. Your pictures are gorgeous!
Those pictures are amazing....looks like volcanic lava in a few of them!
I hope your knee is okay and that you can get an appointment soon and figure out what is going on! Take care, we're all thinking of you!
Hope you feel better soon. Your pictures were very nice, even though you don't feel nice.
Beautiful. Looks like the sky is on fire!! Happy SWF!
Love those fiery skies.
Sydney - City and Suburbs
Incredible skies, hang in there. Happy SWF!
I just think the clouds turned more and more beautiful with each photo, as you will, my dear!
Start thinking about spinning some wool; now that's a bedtime project.
You can always try out for Nitro Circus! You're getting enough experience at pain. LOL!
Call me and let me know that you're okay.
Be pissed off. It's okay.
Be sad and torn. It's okay.
Let the firey sky wash over your wounds and burn them clean.
And you will see more clearly with the dawn.
Winter
Very interesting clouds. And great lighting.
Beautiful sky images, what a gorgeous location! Time to look at some more of your SkyWatches, just joine myself.
The pics are gorgeous! I've got my fingers crossed for you that your knee is just banged up and you'll get back to your excellent progress. As my mother used to say, this too shall pass.
So sorry about your injury. I am a very impatient persob, so I know how you feel. Give yourself some time and when you look at the clouds don't see the gloom, see the beautiful colors that are there and know that the sun is just beyond. Your pics are wonderful.
Sharon
Besides impatient, I can't spell either.
Sharon
Dang! I was hoping maybe that swelling would go down in a day or two and you'd be fine.
Not to be so huh?
Let us know what the doc says - I know it sucks but you're doing the best thing by taking it easy for now - if you've re-injured it you don't want to irritate it by trying to walk around on it.
Can you go into the PT office and get some stim? Maybe that would help with some of the pain? Just a thought.
I'm sorry I did that with my shoulder when I broke it several years ago - I know it can be depressing, but this too shall pass, a couple years from now you'll look back on this and be so grateful that your healed.
Such beautiful photos of such thought provoking skies. Glad you were able to get around well enough to capture them.
Praying for a full recovery for you.
I think I'm channeling my mother - like CTG Ponies' mother, she always told us, "This too shall pass". It will, but you have to go through the process. Hopefully the dr. can tell you how much you have been set back, or if it's more of an insult to the old injury.
But you poured all your feelings into those amazing photos, and we readers are the winners of that beauty.
Nancy in Atlanta
Lisa, I am so sorry that you have had this set back, just when you were doing so well. That is one fierce looking sky. I really hope that everything goes well when you go to see the doctor. Please try and stay positive, I know that is all very well for me to say! My thoughts and good wishes are with you at this difficult time.
I haven't been able to really get online and see what's going on with everyone. Now I do and I see this...
It will be YOUR decision on whether having a horse is worth the risks. Yes there is some danger involved, but bear in mind that any of us could trip and fall down the stairs causing a serious injury (or worse). There is no guaranteed 100% way to keep yourself out of harm.
You will know what is right for you. Somehow though I think you have too much passion to distance yourself from them completely. This same passionate side of yourself may also be what's causing you to be a bit stubborn and to ask too much of yourself in your recovery.
Take care of your beautiful self!
Those are awesome photos. Like you are awesome too. Remember this is temporary. It will go away. Do not let it take over your life. Look for things to make you laugh.
Find the sun shine in your life again. Or see what lesion you have learned.
Today the clouds were forboding, and tomorrow calls for rain and being that it is only May 1...there are times enough for plans and flowers and gardens and horses and healing...it all will take time...forboding skies must be for the clear ones to have hope of seeing forever.
I am rambling nothings and feeling sad and also happy for you knowing that these times will be over someday..and it will be a memory that does not sting anymore.
I hope your spirit can be uplifted from within and without my sweet freind...it does go on and on...and there is an end...with the beginings!
Each day has it's own worries enough...take it slowly and let the day have it's own times without going to far ahead.
LOVE YOU...yep, Kac
oh...er...and..you are a talented phtographer dear...slowing to see clouds may not have been if not for the time down.
I love your clouds and the emotion in them~
Kac
Aagh! I forgot to say:
As soon as I brought up your blog I could tell you must be feeling down. Something to do with the redecorating going on...
Aaaaand, your pics today were beautiful! Tell the truth, did you enhance them in any way?
Hey Lisa,
Thanks for the compliments. I did touch up a couple of the pics, but only to brighten them. It was very early in the morning, so the sky was pretty dark.
But the photo with the fiery sky, I didn't touch up at all.
Amazing, eh? :)
~Lisa
Beautiful skies and a sad post.
Feel better soon!
Great dramatic sky pictures. Hope you see the doctor soon and everything is okay.
Gosh, these are so pretty. Some of them are just so unreal. I have never seen such colors.
Hang in there, I know life can be so frustrating and injuries and pain can put a dampen on spirits and make you feel like throwing in the towel.
I am there right now with my Epilepsy. I have suffered two seizures in one week after I was so sure my huge amount of medications were doing the trick but alas, they didn't work this time.
I am sad and frustrated after spending years in hospitals and being a huge guinea pig to all kinds of pills.
And knowing all the time my Epilepsy was only caused by the hands of abusive parents... it is a hard life and makes the journey even tougher.
Hang in there, my friend... I hope all goes well, I will be thinking good thoughts for you.
Hugs♥♥
beautiful photos....
Fantastic, looks like the sky is on fire, but then New Mexico has some great sunsets..:-)
p.s. hope you are healing up well..
Lisa..First of all, I hope you are doing well...so sorry to read about the bad exeperience with your mare. The sky photos are amazing! Your entire blog was great and I enjoyed catching up.
Great shots! Those clouds were amazing! I do hope your knee checks out alright. Nothing serious!! keep us updated. Is there heat in your knee?
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