The Fakest Friend of All

The above meme describes this next fake friend absolutely perfect. Colleen is definitely not a genuine person and will do anything to create a reputation for herself that matches what she wants others to believe. But she is the fakest person I have ever known or associated with. She will turn on anyone that doesn't benefit her any longer. And she will take credit for other's work and if you call her out on it, she will go into attack mode and act like you're in the wrong and not her. And she will change her personality to fit into a particular group that somehow benefits her.

I had to learn all those lessons the hard way.

I got to know Colleen over 7 years ago, through my time volunteering with a local horse rescue that she was the founder of, Walking in Circles. My involvement with her began when she had discovered a small ranch for sale about an hour south of the horse rescue called Cedar Hill Farm that she was hoping to lease and allow the rescue horses a place to graze during the summer. She not only managed to do that, but she also started using Cedar Hill for horse clinics, trail rides and competitive trail competitions. I attended one of her Confidence Clinics after I sustained several injuries from my first horse, Dakotas Baby Doll, who was totally unsuitable for me. I was ready to give up on riding, but wanted to try a confidence clinic to see if I could muster up enough confidence to have one last try at my dream of horse ownership.

Well, the Confidence Clinic was a success and I was soon looking to sell Baby Doll and buy a safer, more compatible horse for my abilities. After selling Baby Doll, I discovered my current horse, Apache and asked Colleen to go with me to check her out. She offered to let me board Apache at her house so I could try her out on trails and be sure that she was the right horse for me. Colleen had a boarding business at her house, so this worked out perfectly. After realizing that Apache was going to work out for me, I then started paying Colleen to pick up me and my horse and take us to her organized trail rides, competitive ACTHA rides and riding clinics at Cedar Hill. And it wasn't long before Colleen had organized a horse camping weekend, and I signed up and paid her for that, too. I started to think of Colleen as a friend, even though I had to pay money to do anything with her at all. But I figured that it cost money to operate a horse rescue and the money was going to a good place.

Or so I thought.

At Walking in Circles Horse Rescue there is a board of directors that Colleen had to answer to, and one day Colleen was asked to resign after it was discovered that Colleen was mismanaging the rescue's money and spending the donations for personal things that weren't benefiting the rescued horses. I refused to get caught up in all the rumors and gossip and badmouthing of Colleen, because I wanted to be loyal to Colleen for her helping me get back into riding again. But it was shocking and disappointing to hear people, who were supposedly Colleen's friends, like Loeta, Christine, Peggy, and others talking badly about Colleen.

But Colleen quickly reinvented herself and signed onto a lease-to-own for Cedar Hill Farm, and eventually even gathered up a bunch of investors and sponsors and began to get boarders and trainers signed up to do clinics at Cedar Hill, all so she could purchase Cedar Hill and make it her own. And before long she had changed the name of Cedar Hill Farm, to 4 Winds Equestrian Center.

Eventually I realized that I wanted to expand my riding skills, so I started riding down at a place called Acacia Riding Adventures, in San Acacia, NM, because they were riding on rugged trails and in unique areas that were exciting and fun. Dacodah is the owner of Acacia Riding Adventures and he provided me with well trained, seasoned trail horses and fun adventures that instilled confidence and good riding skills. But when Colleen, warned me not to ride at Acacia Riding Adventures, I wanted to know why and asked Dacodah. Apparently, Colleen and Dacodah had tried to go into business together forming Acacia Riding Academy and it worked out very badly with Dacodah having to file restraining orders against Colleen. Dacodah had a lot of warnings to give me about spending time with Colleen. But I refused to listen and instead just focused on building my riding experiences and skills down at San Acacia.

I was also warned by many other people about Colleen and how she uses people for her own gain, and how she had spent donations to the horse rescue for her own personal vacations and for personal items, like a brand new Living Quarters Horse Trailer and a new truck. I was told by others how Colleen will include you in her life and keep you around, but only as long as you benefit her in some way. I was told by Barb how Colleen had used her and taken advantage of her and her husband when they were planning to invest in the business at Cedar Hill. And I was told by another friend R, who she and her husband had volunteered at the horse rescue for Colleen, that Colleen was not to be trusted...ever. She knew things about Colleen that were shocking. And even another friend L, who had boarded her horses with Colleen and volunteered at the horse rescue, told me that Colleen was only nice to you when it benefited her. I was told by Colleen's own daughter and granddaughter that Colleen was known to dump people in a heartbeat if those people were at all any inconvenience or did anything she didn't agree with. Even her own family. And I was told that Colleen would even make up lies to create false stories about people she had kicked out of her life so she could manipulate her current friends and associates into siding with her. I had heard Colleen bad mouthing and being critical of others in her life, but I chose to ignore it because I thought we were friends and I was naive enough to believe that she wasn't doing the same thing to me. And I have to be honest, too, even though it makes me feel ashamed. But I wanted to be included in Colleen's circle because she was always making activities and events happen and it felt good to be a part of that and feel needed and liked, even if I was being used, and even if I felt deep inside that things just didn't seem quite right.

But anyway.......soon Colleen was having me be more involved at 4 Winds. She had asked me to take photos of the facilities and clinic and riding events and in return for the use of my photos, she offered me a lifetime membership at 4 Winds Equestrian Center, with full use of all of the trails, the arenas and round pens and indoor arena and discounts on boarding. She also asked me to host and plan trail rides and horse camping events and she asked me to be the Administrator of the 4 Winds Equestrian Center's Facebook page and to be in charge of online advertising. In hindsight I should have got everything we agreed to written into a legal contract, but I doubt Colleen would have been willing to sign it because that's the way she is able to take advantage of people to get what she wants.

Well, after the Fourth of July Canyon Ride and then a riding event up at Starry Night Ranch she showed me truly what a fake friend she really was. I had been going through a lot of personal problems in my life involving that clique of women that used me and then back stabbed me, along with marital problems involving abuse and infidelity, and it all finally culminated in depression and anxiety. I felt like I had fallen into a deep hole. But instead of being a good friend and supporting me, Colleen instead, along with her husband, blocked me on Facebook, removed me as Admin on the 4 Winds page, and took me off her 4 Winds website as a ride host and organizer. She snuck around and did all that behind my back without telling me anything. I was shocked and disappointed because I had done nothing to her. We hadn't had any arguments or disagreements. She just up and deleted me from her life because I was having personal problems and she felt like I was a liability somehow, even though I had done nothing wrong at all to her or her business.

I called her out on what she did and she accused me of faking my depression and she tried to convince me that if only I would move to AZ to be closer to my husband, my life would be better.

She never even asked me why I felt the way I did or tried to show me support and encouragement. She didn't care that my husband had been verbally and emotionally abusing and even threatening physical abuse for many years to our 3 kids and me as well. She didn't care because she was never a real friend. Colleen never asked about my husband's infidelity and him joining an Asian Dating site for many months so he could meet young Chinese girls and cheat on me. She never asked about the thousands of dollars he was spending on the Asian Dating site and the gifts for the Chinese girls he had long phone and video conversations with. She never asked me about my husband taking me to dinner for our 24th wedding anniversary, and then coming home to video chat with a Chinese girl afterwards. She never asked about how my husband was using our two son's money to fund the cheating and lying. Or how he was using one of our sons to tell all his Asian girl fantasies and desires to. He even showed my son photos of these girls and asked him which ones he would like to be his new stepmom! Colleen wasn't there for me when my husband flew to Hong Kong to meet these Chinese girls and take them out to dinner and a hotel and how I had to find out this was happening through our bank account statements.

I must really be a magnet for disloyal, cheating, dishonest, backstabbing, fake users. Because of my experiences over the past few years, I have learned that I am way too trusting, too honest, too loyal, too kind, too generous, and too naive. Bad people just really seem to seek out people like me.

The Opportunistic Two-Faced Fake Friend

This is someone I always knew in my heart was a fake friend. Loeta only rode with me and offered to haul my horse because she needed a riding partner. She invited herself to ride with me and another former friend, Kendra at Galisteo Preserve 3 years ago and then kept inviting herself to all future riding events I organized. She never once wanted to hang out with me or talk with me outside of riding and she never hung out with me if there were other people on a ride. I knew what kind of person she was after our mutual friend, Colleen was asked to resign from her horse rescue business a few years earlier, due to questionable behavior and activity. Loeta and Colleen were supposed to be best friends, yet after Colleen was removed from WNCR, I often overheard Loeta speaking negatively about Colleen about her involvement at WNCR. Loeta had become the horse rescue's director and she and her husband also helped manage the horse rescue's thrift store, where I had volunteered for a year. It made me sick to hear Loeta badmouth and gossip about Colleen with other people that came into the thrift store.

Talk about a very two-faced person. I should have known better than to include Loeta into my life. But she always seemed to be everywhere there was an opportunity for her, so it was impossible to exclude her anyway.

But ironically, Loeta also seemed to be using Colleen. She was boarding her horses at Colleen's horse boarding facility and also seemed to be using her to get included in any riding events that Colleen planned. When Colleen offered me a lifetime membership to 4 Winds Equestrian Center for the use of any photos I took for her of her facility or riding events, Loeta seemed upset, especially since Colleen had raised Loeta's boarding and membership fees, and yet Colleen and Loeta were supposed to be best friends.

When Loeta placed her loving husband into a nursing home, I found it interesting how she spent more and more time riding with a fellow named Cory, who was married to a mutual friend named Christine. Loeta even started keeping one of her horses at Cory and Christine's house. It was a common sight to see Cory and Loeta together. So, it didn't take long for Christine and Cory to end up divorced with Christine even moving out of state. Afterwards, Loeta became even more involved in Cory's life, house and pet-sitting for him and taking care of both of their horses. In fact, after Christine was out of the picture, it was rare to ever see Loeta unless Cory was with her, all while her husband lived in a nursing home.

So, I shouldn't have been surprised to see Cory and Loeta together when I rode at Fourth of July Canyon in the Summer of 2014. And I shouldn't have been surprised when she asked me not to take photos of her and Cory together out on the trail. And I shouldn't have been surprised that the two of them rode far behind everyone, out of sight, and keeping to themselves. And I shouldn't have been surprised when she contacted me after I wrote my blog post about that Fourth of July Canyon ride, and she told me I needed to remove her and Cory's names from my blog. And I shouldn't have been surprised when she threatened me with a charge of defamation of character for telling the truth about what I experienced that day. And I shouldn't have been surprised that she didn't support me or stand behind me when she saw how badly Paula had treated me or when Paula had her immature outburst while at Fourth of July Canyon.

Of course, in my defense, I had naively believed that Loeta was a real friend. But that was just wishful thinking on my part, because I knew already what an opportunistic, two-faced person she was, long before she stabbed me in the back at the end. So, I have only myself to blame for that unfortunate mistake.

I'm Back........

Yes Indeed.

I allowed mean people to chase me away from my blog for over a year and try to intimidate me into being quiet about what they and other terrible people did to me the previous 2 years. Two of them, Loeta and Colleen, actually threatened me when I wrote about what was done to me over a year ago. Loeta said that I could be sued for defamation of character. But guess what?

"Defamation: Make sure you can prove the statement was false. A defamatory statement must actually be a false one. If the statement is true, you don't have grounds to sue, even if it damaged your reputation. In most cases, statements that can be construed as opinions aren't considered defamatory, because an opinion is subjective and can't be proved as objectively false."

Loeta lied just to manipulate me.

The other person, Colleen, snuck around behind my back and deleted me from her and her husband's lives and horse boarding business. She gossiped and badmouthed me and stabbed me in the back and even stole my photos to use for her business without my permission. Colleen had promised me a lifetime membership at her boarding facility in return for the use of my photos, but then she reneged and took my membership away when it suited her. She then publicly badmouthed me some more when I called her out on it.

And these were two people that professed to be my dear friends. They promised to be loyal and to always have my back just as I had been a loyal and true friend for years. But they wanted to shut me up after they did me wrong and when I told the truth about their actions, because the truth revealed their lies, manipulation and fake personalities. They wanted me to keep quiet and be a nice girl. And I did. But I shouldn't have. I've had to keep it bottled up inside of me for so long that it has made me bitter and resentful. Everything I wrote back then was the truth as I experienced it.
Do you know why bad people get away with mistreating others? Because their victims don't speak out.

But I'm not going to be quiet any longer.

Riding at Fourth of July Canyon

A few weeks ago I took my new mule, Choctaw, for a trail ride with some friends. Since I had only ridden my Choctaw twice, I really wanted to get Colleen's opinion of him.
Paula had offered to take him on some bosque ditchbank rides to get him used to bicycles and other urban experiences, and Choctaw and her foster mule were buddies, so I let her keep him at her place. But I decided to invite her up to the mountains to join my friends for our trail ride up at Fourth of July Canyon, so it just made sense for her to bring Choctaw up for me to ride.
But first I asked Colleen to ride him for a little while, while I rode her mare.  Notice, the britchen that Choctaw is wearing? That britchen involves a long, terrible experience surrounding the obnoxious behavior of someone I had falsely believed to be a friend.

I hadn’t bought a britchen for Choctaw yet because I was told by his previous owners that they never used one on him on their trails and hills and his saddle never shifted forward. Indeed, while doing his test ride, we rode down into a deep arroyo and his saddle stayed in place. Also, when I rode him at the Mule and Donkey Event just a week earlier, Paula told Allen, another friend, that Choctaw’s saddle fit him well and he didn’t need a britchen. So I trusted everyone’s opinions and information.
But when I saddled up Choctaw for our Fourth of July Canyon trail ride, Paula said I needed a britchen and she offered to let me use the one she had, even though it was the only britchen she had brought. I was actually surprised that she hadn’t brought me an extra britchen since she has two, one for her mule and one for her foster mule, especially since I had only had Choctaw for only a couple weeks and she had told me that he didn’t need one! If she thought Choctaw needed a britchen and knew she had told me earlier that he didn’t, then a good, kind friend would have…should have brought an extra britchen to share or at least should have told me that we should put off riding at Fourth of July Canyon until I bought Choctaw a britchen. I could have ridden Apache afterall!
But our trail ride started off well. Choctaw was perfect for Colleen and her mare was wonderful for me. There were 11 of us heading out to ride together on the beautiful trails at Fourth of July Canyon in the Manzano Mountains.


Colleen's mare is much taller than I'm used to and feels very comfortable, but a little like riding a tall elephant smoothly lumbering through the forest.

My friend Kristi liked having her horse tailgating Colleen's mare because he tends to be very forward and chargy and it makes her nervous when she can't control him, but she likes to use Colleen's mare as a wall to slow him down. Choctaw was happy to stroll along way in the back.

It was Colleen’s first time to ever ride a mule and she kept saying how comfortable he is and how relaxed and wonderful he is on the trails. I was very proud of my new mule!

We had two young boys on the ride,the horse in front is actually a talented Mounted Shooting horse.

The forest was so beautiful and green. Every time I looked back at Colleen and Choctaw, Colleen was grinning from ear to ear. Mules just make you smile!

Some of these photos in this post were taken by Paula. Here you can see me riding Colleen's mare out in front and Colleen on Choctaw.

                                                      Pretty cool looking dead tree…..

                                          See? You can’t help but smile while riding a mule!

At one point a couple miles down the trail, we had to enter through the Wilderness gate….


Choctaw walked right through, relaxed and content to be out on the trail….

                                              C and my awesome mule Choctaw!

The trail was a bit steep and narrow in sections and there were rocks and boulders, but Choctaw easily covered it all and had no problems even though he has mostly been ridden on the flats and on the rolling hills of the Chupadera Mountains in Southern New Mexico. But I have spoken with his previous owners who owned him in Oklahoma and they had taken him to the Winding Stairs Mountain Recreation Area in the Ouachita Mountains at Cedar Lake Equestrian Campground
for a long weekend of camping on trails that varied from easy to very rugged. And even though he was ridden every day, all day, he never was sore and was always ready to head out on the trails.

The game plan was for Colleen to ride Choctaw until we stopped for lunch and then we would switch…..

Standing on the Crest of the Manzano Mountains beneath Mosca Peak.

                              Me up front with Colleen and Choctaw behind.

And we finally made it to our lunch/rest stop where I tied up Choctaw, and he patiently waited until I was done with my lunch.


And then we all saddled up and got ready to continue down the trail.

                                  See my face? It’s impossible to ride a mule without smiling!


                                                        Choctaw is so comfortable to ride!

And those ears! Sometimes they stand straight up, sometimes they spread out like airplane wings, and sometimes they just flop all over the place.

The trail was very thickly overgrown and it was kind of magical to ride through all of that lush green, especially when you live in a desert state like New Mexico.


                                                         Antenna's (Ears) Forward!

                                                              Yep…..still smiling!

                             Airplane ears flying over the Crest of the Manzano Mountains!


                                  Smiling huge here!…..Gotta love those airplane ears!

The switchbacks began…………and this is where Paula began griping, complaining, and whining about not having a britchen on her mule because my mule was wearing it instead. It didn’t matter that she had offered it to me at the beginning of the ride and she even put it on my mule. Didn’t matter that it was her choice to loan me her britchen and not bring another one for me even though she believed that BOTH of our mules would need a britchen. Didn’t matter that she was supposed to be a good friend who should be helpful and not hurtful to a friend, and not set up her friend to fail.
No none of those things mattered, because she raised hell and caused a scene and made all of us on the trail ride listen to her complain. She chose to dismount her mule because she said he was not happy about going downhill and his saddle was riding up on him. She chose to walk the remainder of the trail ride, and even played the martyr and refused anyone’s help or assistance. Willow even offered her son’s horse to ride, but Paula refused! I even offered her Choctaw to ride and I would walk. I was wearing my Ariat hiking riding boots, so walking would have been no big deal for me. But she refused! And she even went so far as to loudly proclaim that she was walking to “teach me a lesson and make me feel bad”…exact words! I already felt bad, but I was angry that she could be so needlessly cruel.
Paula did take up Colleen’s offer to pony her foster mule, but ironically was very rude towards Colleen on several occasions during and after our ride. She was also rude towards others too. When anyone made a silly joke about our mules, or about us riding an ass, Paula would roll her eyes and comment “horse people!”. She complained to me at the beginning of the ride about Colleen being late to the trail head. And Colleen told me later that evening on the telephone when she called me, that during the ride whenever she teased that if I ever deciding to sell my mule, she wanted to be first in line, Paula rudely said, “Lisa better never sell him to the likes of HER!”.
And then when the majority of our group rode on ahead without Paula,(and I was glad, because I was tired of hearing Paula whine and complain) she trailed behind with two other riders in our group, Loeta and Cory, probably complaining all the way back to the trail head. (I was later told by Loeta that yes, Paula did frequently complain, yet she still refused any help or offers to ride their horses)
Her behavior was really horrible. And I was so embarrassed that I had even invited her on the ride!

When I got back to the trail head, I took her mule and mine and unsaddled, untacked, brushed down, and watered both mules. But when Paula returned to the trailer, she never once acknowledged what I did for her and just sulked around and shot me evil looks. I even hung up her bridle, britchen, saddle, scooped the manure, placed hay bags back inside the trailer and loaded my own mule into her trailer. She never even said thank you.
What she did say was that she was going to bring my mule back to my house and she wasn’t going to ride him on her ditch bank trails. She said it in a very threatening way. I think she thought I would beg her to keep my mule and would be offended…but seriously? I would have never let her take Choctaw back to her home after the terrible behavior she portrayed towards me and my friends. She seemed surprised when I agreed with her but then told me that she thought I wasn’t the best person to own a mule and that I should sell him to her (By the way, this was at least the 4th time she had asked to buy him from me! Yes, I got a good deal on him, and she knew it. And she acted jealous and seemed to want him for herself, even telling me that it was a good situation for her since her foster mule would be going back to his owner at the end of the summer, and her own mule was still laid up from an injury, so she would need another mule to ride.)

But, when I told her no…. Yet again, she got upset and started criticizing me about the britchen, about taking Choctaw on mountain trails, claiming they were too rugged for him and it was cruel of me. She complained that I didn’t douse Choctaw in fly spray before our ride, even though there were only a few flies at the trail head and none on the trail. She also chastised me about how I asked my friend Colleen to ride Choctaw and give me her opinion. Paula claimed that her opinion should have been good enough for me!!
She even made me cry out of anger and frustration. I don’t do drama well and I rarely ever get angry. I'm also very softhearted, which seems to make me an easy target to be other people’s doormat. But here's the kicker......when I was crying, Paula was LAUGHING at me and saying how 'hilarious' (her exact words) it was that I was crying.

When we finally got to my house and I took my mule back, she once again told me I should sell Choctaw to her. She actually said, “This is your last chance. You sell him to me and I’ll do all the hard stuff with him, and I’ll let you ride him and do the fun stuff”. Exact words! I was offended that she said that to me. I then offered her a check for $100 to cover the costs of feeding him and scooping his poop for the couple days that Choctaw was at her place. My intent was for her to finally realize I was severing all ties with her. She greedily snatched the check from my hand, just as she'd done with all the hundreds of dollars of gas money and countless lunches I paid for her over the past year.
But then as I walked up the hill to my barn, she even had the audacity to yell out loudly, “Give him some of Apache’s Previcox tonight”. She said it as if she owned him or thought her opinions mattered to me!

What the hell?? Why would he need my mare’s arthritis medicine?! He was not sore after our 7 mile ride, he was not even tired. And he’s only an 8 year old mule…not a bit of arthritis in his joints.
I had to shake my head in disbelief as I ignored her “request” and continued walking, because one of the things she harped about during the short time that I knew Paula over the last year, is that she knew best when it came to taking care of her horses and mules, and she didn’t put up with people telling her what to do for her animals. In fact her favorite saying is “My Mule, My Rules!”.
Well, she was crazy insane to even think I would consider selling my mule to her.





Later that evening Colleen called me at home because she had seen me crying and was upset that Paula had caused it. And on the phone with me, she was angry...no...furious...with Paula's horrible behavior. Colleen aggressively told me on the phone that "that nasty woman had better never show her face at my business nor try to ride with me again". Yes, those were her exact words.

(But I later discovered that Colleen is a fake friend, a user and a manipulator and will say and do whatever she needs to get her way or get what she wants. In fact, a year later she is best buddies with Paula. Talk about a backstabber!)

Well, other than discovering that some people I thought were friends actually never were, and they just seemed to have used me to get invited to rides and be shown my favorite trail routes, the ride at Fourth of July Canyon was absolutely wonderful! Choctaw was perfect and did everything I asked. He even led for a while when we had to bushwhack around a fallen tree and he made me smile the entire day.
Now if only people could be as wonderful as animals, life would be perfect.


(All information in this blog post is the truth as I experienced it.)

ACTHA ~ On the Trail Again

 

Have you ever spent a night not being able to sleep at all because you were excited and anxious about something that was going to happen the next day?

You set the alarm, so you can get a good night’s sleep without worrying about over-sleeping, but still can’t allow sleep to take over. So you find yourself sitting up in bed again and again to check the time, and discover that only an hour has passed since you last checked, and you’re still awake. Finally you notice the sun is rising and you might as well just get up and start getting ready for the big event, even though you’re bleary-eyed and exhausted, and you can’t even eat breakfast because your tummy is full of fluttering butterflies and buzzing bees. Have you ever had that same experience?

Well, that’s just what I was going through on Friday night and Saturday morning. And so my llamas, goats and horse were quite surprised to find me stumbling up to the barn at 6am to feed them, when I usually don’t get up there until at least 8am. It worked out well, though, because I wanted Apache to be able to enjoy her breakfast in peace before my friend Roni came by with her horse trailer and her mare, to pick us up for the CTC at 6:45am.

Apache was ready to go when Roni arrived and she quickly loaded right up on her own without any trouble. And we were on our way…..just 4 miles down the road to Founders Ranch. After parking near the SASS Mounted Shooting Arena, we left the horses to munch their hay breakfast, while Roni and I jumped on a wagon, pulled by a truck, to take us to the Downtown area of Founders Ranch so we could try to swallow down some breakfast of our own. The meals that day were catered by Outlaw Catering, a company that does meal catering for the Film Industry here in New Mexico. It was a pretty good breakfast buffet with biscuits and gravy, veggie scramble, scrambled eggs, bacon and sausage, as well as juice and coffee, but my tummy was still twisted in knots and I could barely choke much of it down. The highlight of breakfast for me was having Tom Scrima join us, him having recognized my name and face right away from our e-mail correspondence over the past year and a half. Our relationship may not have started out in the very best way, but it has grown into a warm friendship and I really like the man, and also his beautiful and kind wife, Carrie. They have a place in Texas and a ranch in Colorado and I was honored that they invited me to come up to Colorado and stay and ride with them someday. I just might take them up on that!

(I took this photo of the two of them that evening during the Dinner and Awards Ceremony. Standing beside them is Theresa Falzone, NMMSAR member and the owner of the famous Lipizzaner/German Warmblood gelding, Zeema, America’s Favorite Trail Horse.)

Well because of our chatty breakfast, Roni and I ended up being about 10 minutes late to get back to the Horse Camp and SASS Arena for the Rider’s Briefing. We managed to only hear the last few minutes of the obstacle information, so we were going to have to rely on the ride map and obstacle description sheet that were handed out to all the riders, to get us through the ride.

(By the way, that’s Tom Scrima, Founder of ACTHA, front and center in the photo below)

After the Rider’s Briefing, and visiting with old friends, Roni and I headed over to the trailer and began grooming and tacking up our horses. I had bought Apache a hay bag last Spring, but hadn’t had the opportunity to have her use it until this ride, and I was surprised at how quickly she claimed it as her own and figured out the whole “eating-through-a-small-hole” thing.

Roni’s husband had stopped by to give her some support and encouragement, which I thought was very sweet, and he even helped me rig up my hay bag to her trailer using some tow straps from his car. I took  this cute photo of the two of them because I know how rare it is to have couple photos taken with your significant other.

 

I also acquired some new skills right along with Apache, too. I managed to move past three of the major fears I’ve had since my mare kicked me last summer: 1)Brushing her tail, 2)Picking out her back feet, and 3)Walking close to her back end.

Those are essential skills for any horse owner, but I just couldn’t do them until my mind was focused on actively preparing my mare for the CTC. But Apache made it easy for me by politely lifting up her back feet without me even asking or having to run my hand down them. All I had to do was was look at her back feet and she lifted them nicely for me. She was also very gentle, careful and quiet about her movements as if she was trying to stay aware of where my body was in relation to hers. Even when I fumbled around with having to make adjustments to her cinch, breast collar and bridle, she was nothing but patient and willing. I’m also always impressed with how eagerly she accepts the bit and will just reach down and take it in her mouth as soon as I place it below her muzzle.

After I got her all tacked up, I walked her around a little bit to allow her to relax her belly, so I could readjust the cinch. As we walked we watched the other horses and riders warming up in the arena. After about 10 minutes, I took a deep breath and decided it was time to mount up. Apache stood rock still while I mounted and got everything adjusted and after taking  another deep breath or two, we finally walked off, heading towards the arena, where Roni was already warming up her mare, waiting for our ride time to begin at 9:30am.

It was a beautiful, sunny day. Bug-free. Not a cloud in the sky, and even though there was a 20% chance of rain that day, I felt terribly guilty for packing the extra weight of my slicker on Apache’s back because I knew it was a slim to none chance we’d actually get any rain. (And we never did)

This is the view looking west out over the Horse Camp and SASS arena, from downtown Founders Ranch.

Even before I reached the arena I was surprised at the outpouring of support and camaraderie I received from my fellow riders, many of them knowing what I had been through last summer. Some of them had ridden with me in Jessica G’s group lesson 2 weeks earlier and had watched me go from being nervous and lacking self-confidence while being ponied around an arena, to a more confident, smiling rider crossing a wooden bridge and practicing side-passes, by the end of the lesson.

And there I was riding in a 7 mile Competitive Trail just two weeks later.

I wanted to give them all a hug right then and there. I really appreciated their generous, kind support at that moment…and it didn’t end there either. During the ride, other riders would come up beside us, who knew my story or had ridden with me last year, and their words of encouragement were just what I needed to keep going on down the trail.

And being able to pass those same words of encouragement onto other riders, just added to that feeling of confidence and good will. I love that about the ACTHA rides. We’re all competing, but rarely does anyone ever act mean spirited towards another rider. The competition is all in good fun and we’re all like a big family just enjoying our horses, the trail, our fellow riders, and some silly, but challenging, obstacle challenges.

Finally it was 9:30am and we gathered together in our group of 10, that I had signed up to ride with the day before, and I was happy to realize that I knew everyone in our group, and had ridden with all of them before.

There was Cory,

and Loeta, (with Mr. Bill and Roni in the background)

and Anna,

Kristi and her daughter Mari.

All of them friends whom I know from volunteering at Walkin N Circles Ranch Horse Rescue.

And there was the Veterinarian Mr. Bill (in the photo with Loeta above) and his wife Donna on her blinged-out, be-jeweled mule.

I just loved that mule. And he cracked me up every time he brayed. Donna said it was like sitting on an ocean wave when he did his half neigh/bray thing. lol!

  

I knew them from previous rides when I have ridden with them, had judged, or had photographed the rides. And of course, there was Roni, riding her gorgeous mare Halley Cat.

And me on my sweet mare, Apache.

We started off by getting slightly lost as we took a left turn and headed north, instead of a right to head south. But the map, as you can see below was a little confusing due to how the route appeared to cross over itself. For easier understanding, I added the colors, extra wording, and compass (and erased the phone #s) on the map with my Photoscape software.

The ride begins in Orange from the Arena and heads South to the southernmost point of Founders Ranch. And then it loops around and heads North again, crosses a gravel road, and finally arrives at Obstacle #1, the Moo-Cow Bridge.

From SASS Arena to the Moo-Cow Bridge, Apache was very forward and looking at everything, especially at all the metal shooting targets below us in the SASS Shooting Range. She wasn’t spooky, just very interested. She has always liked to stop and enjoy any expansive views we come across, or maybe she just knows I enjoy them, too, and like to take photographs. Either way, we did end up a ways behind the end of our group, stopping by the side of the trail a few times to take photos and gaze at the beautiful views.

(Downtown Founders Ranch are those colorful buildings below us and to the right. Those are the Sandia Mountains off in the distance in the middle of the photo. On the other side of those mountains is the city of Albuquerque. And on the other side of the Ortiz Mountains, to the far right in the photo, is the city of Santa Fe)

In the beginning of the ride I was able to easily move Apache into a trot and even up to a canter a couple times, so we could catch up with our group after our photo and view breaks……but that would change drastically later on in the ride. Still it was fun for the two of us to be trotting and cantering down the trail again. I think she really enjoyed herself, especially since the morning was cool and the first section of trail was mostly in the shade.

When I realized that the first obstacle was to be a bridge, I felt confident that Apache would easily ace it, with no problem.

And she did…..even though it was a blindingly white bridge…….until we got to the other side and there were 3 weird white and brown wooden cows on either side of the narrow trail, which were part of the obstacle.

(Later that same evening a cowboy wedding was held there on the other side of that Mission facade) 

Apache refused to walk forward and did a sort of half back up/half spin-around thing. And that kind of startled me. The judge told me that we had timed out and to just dismount and walk her through the scary White Pine Cows, which I did, and Apache calmly followed me through, with no problem, except for a snort or two. Silly mare.

Right after Moo Cow Bridge Apache decided she didn't want to keep up with our group any longer and chose a pace that seemed slower than molasses. She ignored my leg squeezes and the only thing that would keep her moving forward, at a walk, were some nudges and kicks with my boot. Looking back now, it seems to me, that she decided right after that first obstacle, that she was going to pace herself at her own comfortable relaxed walk, especially since the day was really heating up. By 10 am it was already above 90F degrees, and although it was less than 10% humidity, the dry heat felt like we were being baked in an oven. I had brought along two 24 oz bottles of Gatorade in my cantle bag and a 16 oz bottle of Gatorade in my horn bag, and I had a feeling they weren’t going to last all day, because I had already emptied the 16 oz bottle, and we had only finished the first obstacle.

So, in hindsight, as frustrating as Apache’s slow pace was, Jessica G. was right on the money when she was working with Apache at my house the week before and told me that my mare has strong self-preservation instincts.

And also in hindsight, I should have listened to my mare and my gut instincts and just rode our own ride, not worrying about keeping up with the other riders. I wasn’t there to prove that we could win a race. I was just there to prove to myself, and my mare that we could ride together again confidently and safely while having fun.

So, yeah, I did get caught up with feeling kind of frustrated and disappointed that we couldn’t keep up with our group of friends, even more so because I think my friend Roni, felt a little obligated to stay back with me, even though she could have easily left me behind with her much faster mare. I finally just told her to go on ahead and that my mare and I were just fine moseying along by ourselves. We were told during the briefing that once we had started down the trail, no one was required to stay within a specific group. We were invited to ride as fast or as slow as we wanted. There was no time limit and each rider and horse could make the ride their own experience. I didn’t want to put a cramp on Roni’s enjoyment and expectations for the ride, so I encouraged her to go on and catch up with the group, if that’s what she desired. 

So she did go on and lope down the trail to catch up with the group and then it was just Apache and I by ourselves.

And you wanna know something?

I secretly preferred it that way. Is that bad of me? I mean, don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy riding with other people down the trail while having someone to chat with, but sometimes I really like the peace and quiet of spending time alone with my horse, focusing on her and the nature around us without any human distractions. Maybe that comes from me being raised as an independent Only-Child or maybe I’m just a little bit anti-social?  I’m not sure, but I must admit that my favorite moments during Saturday’s ACTHA ride, were when it was just me and my mare alone on the trail.

And Apache didn’t seem to mind it at all when I sang way off-key, the songs “My Darling Clementine”, “Home on the Range”, “Jingle Bells”, “Itsy Bitsy Spider”(I think she really liked that one because she’d pick up the pace every time I sang it). She also seemed to like “Silent Night” and “Somewhere over the Rainbow”, too, but those two songs made her want to take a nap and she really slowed our pace when I sang them, so they were just one time deals.

And while I did do some singing just to help us both focus and relax, most of the trail was spent just being silent and enjoying the sounds of the birds, and the wind in the trees, and my horse clip-clopping up and down the trail.  

           

So, where was I?

Oh yeah. From Obstacle #1, the Moo Cow Bridge, the trail continued north, past the same SASS Arena, where the ride began, and soon passed through a gate in a fence. The gate was an odd one, too, almost an obstacle in it’s own right. Although it was plenty wide enough, it had a low metal beam across the top, that the smart-thinking NMMSAR had placed a foam pool noodle over, to keep rider’s heads safe. Still, even I had to bend down low to keep from hitting that beam, so anyone with a horse taller than 15.3HH probably had to dismount or hang off the side of their horse to ease underneath that beam.

At the gate I managed to catch up with my group and Roni, too. A couple riders, who were riding TBs had to dismount to get through the gate opening, but my short girl Apache allowed me to just duck down across her back to ease on through.

Once through the gate we entered onto public Open Space Lands and weren’t on Founders Ranch for the next 4 miles.

The next section of trail traveled alongside a barbed wire fence with some much needed shade, which was very enjoyable.

Our group quickly passed us by as Apache and I just bumbled along at our own slow pace. But not long afterwards, we came upon Obstacle #2 where we caught up with our group once again and had to wait for about 15 minutes for the group in front of us to work through the obstacle.

Obstacle #2 was called “Don’t Monkey Around” and was primarily a Dismount obstacle….very creatively done, but also very challenging with the added “Injured Animal” added into the challenge.

This gal and her pony had no problems with this challenge.

The injured animal just happened to be a large hairy, white stuffed gorilla, holding a bright yellow banana. Riders were supposed to ride over to the Hairy Stuffed Ape and dismount, then convince their equine to carry said Hairy White Ape on their withers.

This lady and her horse traveled to Texas recently to compete for the title of America’s Favorite Trail Horse.

Quite a few horses, said in no uncertain terms, “There is no way in Hell I am letting that scary white thing touch me!”

Like Roni’s mare, Halley Cat.

They timed out right about the same time that Halley tried to smoosh herself into the trees to get away from the scary hairy gorilla.

And because Apache didn’t seem to appreciate those creepy white Pine Cows from the first obstacle, I just decided to pass on the big white hairy gorilla, and stood around watching the other riders try to attempt it instead.

In hindsight, I don’t know why Apache and I just didn’t continue on down the trail in front of our group. They would have caught up with us in no time at all, because it seemed that their pace was set for a “Hurry Up and Wait” theme all day. They would ride quickly to the next obstacle and then have to wait for 15-20 minutes for the group in front of them to move through an obstacle, and then wait some more for everyone in our group to take a turn at the obstacle. Apache and I always caught up to them…but we would only have to wait a couple minutes to attempt the same obstacle.

Thinking about this now, I kind of liked our snail-slow pace after all.

 

To Be Continued……………