They say that "Imitation is the Sincerest Form of Flattery", but I can't say that it's always true, especially when the imitation comes from someone who claims to be a friend, yet tries to take over your life by stealing your friends, including themselves into every aspect of your life, and even changing her appearance to look more like you. That stalker-ish behavior borders on creepy and crazy.
But that's what my ex-friend Kendra did. I met her in early 2012, and even though our relationship ended in mid-2013 and we were only "friends" for a little more than a year, she quickly integrated herself into my life through Facebook, friend-ing all of my friends, even those she had never met, tagging me and using my name to make herself more popular, inviting herself to anything I planned, including events, rides and even activities on my little farm. She even tried to look like me, wearing a riding helmet and helmet covers, even getting her hair cut like mine.
Unbeknownst to me, she was making her plans to try and sabotage my life by backstabbing and betraying me. I was too naive to realize what an opportunistic fake friend she was.
We started riding together in 2012 and we seemed to enjoy each other's company. We both enjoyed exploring trails on our horses and we even went hiking together. Kendra started encouraging me to invite my other friends to ride with us and to plan group rides, which I did. And before long, we had a pretty large riding group and my friends were her friends. Her scheming plans were laid.
I organized several horse camping weekend events and made sure to include everyone. But ironically, I was rarely ever invited by my fellow riding partners to join them for any rides. But they all took advantage of my planning and organizing and showed up to my rides.
At the time, I didn't have a safe horse trailer nor was able to use my family's truck to tow it with, so I was at the mercy of others to haul my horse and it was a humbling experience. I learned that people treat you like you are less when you need help. And they seem to think that you are weak and they can manipulate you and control you because of your neediness. Even though I always gave those who hauled my horse, money to compensate for their time and gas, and I often paid for and provided lunch on road trips and trail rides, it's still not a good place to be in. Especially not when you're dealing with fake friends. It's only a matter of time before they turn on you with betrayal.
It's didn't take long for Kendra to betray me and stab me in my back. One day I posted a link to a video on a local horse group, about the cruelty of soreing on Tennessee Walking Horses. And one bossy bully, Erlene, quickly hijackeded my post with several of her groupie followers. I never got pulled into the bickering and debating, but when my post was hijacked with Erlene and her cronies personally attacking and being rude to fellow commenters, I chose to delete my post, just as anyone has a right to do, and what all good moderators do, to keep groups from becoming over run with negativity. But Linda, the Admin, didn't mind her group becoming the next Jerry Springer Show and she admonished me for deleting my post and sided with the bully gang. And unbeknownst to me, Kendra was slinking around on FB watching the drama, yet never speaking up and showing her support for me, her supposed friend. (Ironically, this is where Paula entered into my life because she stood up for me and against Erlene and Linda) Instead Kendra betrayed me by liking posts of anyone that criticized me for deleting my post. And when several people started attacking me personally for blocking them and criticizing me for needing rides for my horse, Kendra liked their Facebook posts and made comments to these people that she would like to be included in their circle and on rides they planned. She was apparently jumping ship when the person she had been using to become popular, me, wasn't popular anymore. She didn't want to be connected with me because I stood up against the bullies, because she wanted them to like her.
So, when I discovered her backstabbing behavior, I called her out on it, and she denied it, of course, and then she unfriended and blocked me on Facebook. And that was the end of our supposed friendship.
I guess I should be grateful that we were only friends for just over a year, but it still hurt me, because I had trusted her and allowed her into my life and accepted her as a friend, only to discover what a manipulating, opportunistic, backstabber she really was.
And Kendra really showed her true colors yet again, when I hauled my horse out to Tucson, AZ for a week of horse camping in the late winter of 2014. I had organized the horse camping week and invited several people, including another fake friend, Barb. Well, Barb was on the fence about going and finally decided she couldn't go. And only one other couple were able to go, and they met me there. But apparently, Barb was resentful about me going, and Kendra must have decided to strike while the situation seemed sensitive because...well, you know what they say, "When the cat's away, the mice do play". When I returned from AZ, I discovered that my supposed friend, Barb had invited Kendra over to her place to ride with her, and they had become fast friends...even though Barb was made aware of what Kendra had done to me and knew how much Kendra had hurt me, and what a lying fake friend Kendra really was.
Oh well. I decided that the two of them probably did me a favor and they actually deserved each other. Two opportunistic, manipulative, disloyal, fake friends. Good riddance.
To be continued........
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